Read

This Story Will Make You Think About Life Differently

Creator:
Published:
May 20, 2024
May 26, 2021
Have a new perspective on life after reading this story.|Have a new perspective on life after reading this story.

Jonathan Tjarks got sick this spring and was in bad shape — fevers, fatigue, weight loss. For the longest time, doctors didn’t know what was wrong with him. Finally, they honed in on a type of cancer that has spread throughout his body. It is treatable, but even though he’s only 31 years old, the recovery rate is less than 50 percent.

“I just couldn’t get one thought out of my head,” Jonathan writes. “I could actually die. Cancer might not kill me, but it could.”

The experience raises some really tough questions for him — questions he shares in a compelling story for The Ringer called “Long Night of the Soul.” If you have a few minutes to read about his journey, it will absolutely change the way you think about your life.

One of the most effective images in his story reveals our allergy to thinking about death:

One of the best metaphors I’ve heard for modern life is that it’s a car headed toward a cliff’s edge while billboards line both sides of the road, blocking the driver’s view. Those billboards are all the distractions that society has to offer. Netflix. Sports. Movies. Music. Everything you consume to avoid thinking about where you are ultimately headed. And those billboards cover your view until the end of the road, when suddenly the cliff approaches. Then, as your car is flying in the air, that’s when you start thinking about death and the meaning of life.

As a Christian, I felt like I was prepared for that moment. But there’s nothing that can truly do that. It’s the long night of the soul. It’s a version of a well-known phrase that I often think of. I don’t care how strong your faith is. Staring into the abyss will make you question everything. I wish getting through it were as simple as quoting a few Bible verses and then going to bed.

So what is a person to do? Jonathan turned to his faith. Even if faith doesn’t remove the fear he feels about death, putting his life in God’s hands does give him a sense of purpose, a sense that God is walking with him through this experience.

It turns out that there’s a long tradition in our faith of contemplating death. The practice is called memento mori, and it helps us remember that our lives are finite and limited — that we will all die one day. That awareness helps us search for purpose and meaning — to find and hold on to the things that matter the most.

Grotto contributor Sister Theresa Aletheia Noble, FSP, was just profiled in The New York Times for bringing memento mori to Twitter and Instagram. She’s often referred to as “the death nun,” but her outlook is not dour or depressing. Remembering our death actually leads to joy, she says, because it clarifies who we are — or, more precisely whose we are.

Sister Aletheia and Jonathan would both agree that it’s helpful to live with an awareness of our death — even if we’re perfectly healthy right now. Being firmly grounded in the things that matter most brings hope and purpose to our days — it actually makes us stronger because we tap into God’s loving presence and are sustained by it.

And whether or not we are willing to face our mortality, it’s a reality that will come for each of us regardless. There is no escape, so the only way is through. As Jonathan writes:

Most Americans spend so much time striving, trying to be successful, trying to climb further up the ladder. Trying to achieve. Trying to give our lives meaning. It all fades away in that moment, when all you are left to grapple with is what you really believe about life and death.

It doesn’t matter who you are, or what you have done, or how much medical care your money can buy. We all have to face that moment. It’s the only moment when every person on Earth is truly equal. We come into this world with nothing and leave it the same way.

Creators:
Grotto
Published:
May 20, 2024
May 26, 2021
On a related note...
Finding the Humor in Grief

Finding the Humor in Grief

Molly Cruitt

What is Lent? Catholic Trivia

What is Lent? Catholic Trivia

Grotto

How to Be an Ally in the Fight for Racial Justice

How to Be an Ally in the Fight for Racial Justice

Kayla August

Holy Spirits Wine Brings People Together (and to God)

Holy Spirits Wine Brings People Together (and to God)

Grotto

First Day of Spring Spotify Playlist | #GrottoMusic

First Day of Spring Spotify Playlist | #GrottoMusic

Grotto

5 Priceless Gifts We Forget To Give

5 Priceless Gifts We Forget To Give

Lillian Fallon

Grief Can Make the Holidays Beautiful if We Let It

Grief Can Make the Holidays Beautiful if We Let It

Genevieve Nield

He Brews Beers and Community

He Brews Beers and Community

Grotto

Join the Movement to #RejuvenateTheChurch

Join the Movement to #RejuvenateTheChurch

Sarah Yaklic

How to Start Your Own Organic Yard

How to Start Your Own Organic Yard

Emily Bouch

Why Pope Francis Wants You to Pray the Rosary Right Now

Why Pope Francis Wants You to Pray the Rosary Right Now

Grotto Shares

Easter Joy Spotify Playlist | #GrottoMusic

Easter Joy Spotify Playlist | #GrottoMusic

Grotto

4 Lessons I Learned from Rock Climbing

4 Lessons I Learned from Rock Climbing

Tanner Kalina

“To the Man Who Marries My Best Friend”

“To the Man Who Marries My Best Friend”

Clare McCallan

6 Sustainable Gift Ideas for the Holidays

6 Sustainable Gift Ideas for the Holidays

Lauren Lawson

Boxing to Fight Parkinson's Disease

Boxing to Fight Parkinson's Disease

Grotto

How I Made a Major Life Decision Without Stressing About It

How I Made a Major Life Decision Without Stressing About It

Sophie Caldecott

Artist Brings Beauty to Skid Row

Artist Brings Beauty to Skid Row

Grotto

How I Cultivated Community When I Moved to Chicago

How I Cultivated Community When I Moved to Chicago

Clarissa Aljentera

I Suck at Meditating, But Journaling Helps Me Instead

I Suck at Meditating, But Journaling Helps Me Instead

Emily Mae Mentock

newsletter

We’d love to be pals.

Sign up for our newsletter, and we’ll meet you in your inbox each week.